School Days

School started last week. I am such a drama queen, because it's not even that bad. I love my schedule, and what's not suprising at all is the fact that my spirit gets more abused at home than it does at school. What was I worried about? Pshh.

First period is band, as always. Our new director is well, new. He does things a lot differently. Some of the changes are good, like not having night practices, but I feel like more of them are just irritating me. Second period is Counsiling and Mental Health. Can you say complete blow off class? I didn't expect it to be hard, but I did expect to learn. Third period is Academic Decathalon. I am so proud of myself! I've actually been keeping up with my work, and its not as much as it seems like it is. I really wanna make the team. Fourth period on A day is Advanced Health. There are some interesting characters in there, but I'm expecting it to be fun. How can it not be when you get to perform for elementary students and eat off campus? :P My fourth period on B day is PALs. I had fun with that last year and I'm glad I decided to do it again this year. I always thought I hated kids, but that class helped me realize that they're the best people you'll ever meet. Fifth period is AP Economics. Me, Candace, Sheyla, Artaya, and Jerrett, have too much fun in there xD. Mr. Turner teaches it but, GASP! We still manage to keep a classroom environment. Sixth period is Spanish 3. I love Mrs. Pope! She's so funny, and it kind of amazes me how a full white woman can speak such authentic spanish. Not to mention that she totally said "far" the other day, haha. Seventh period [as of now] is AP Calculus. I definitely only signed up for that class because I thought I wouldn't be able to take AP Statistics. Hallelujah, the Lord is faithful and I should have a schedule change coming through on Monday. Sixth period will be AP Statistics, and seventh period will be Spanish 3. The only sacrafice was that instead of taking AP psychology next semester, I'll have to take... something else? I don't remember. It's a garbage class though. I was just happy to have been set free from Calculus and the wrath of Mr. Tillerson. xD

Last night was my last first football game and halftime performance. I can't believe I'm a senior. I have to do something about college! I have to be able to keep it together when everything starts to end! I have to make memories that will last forever. xO What am I going to do with myself? D:

Living with my mother is getting out of hand. Sometimes this house feels like prison. I have so much built up resentment towards her, I kind of don't think it'll ever mellow out. I dont look up to her anymore, she doesn't make me smile anymore, it's just a mess. I should be used to it, I should be over it, but I'm not. Silly me. Oh my goodness. Thursday night, my Lyric May had to experience the devastation of being alive. Not cool at all, she's only two! My heart seriously just broke when I heard her start to cry, but at least I was there to hold her while the grown ups acted like they weren't grown.

Hey. Hey you. Yes, you. I hate her, because she makes me feel so insignificant. You have way more history with her than with me, and you think that just because you say she doesnt matter that I'm supposed to believe that in my heart. I wish I could, because I know you only say things that you mean. And I'll deal with it as fast as I can, I promise. It's my problem, not yours.

But back to happiness, and friends, and joy.

Band isn't the same without Christopher Del Monte. Why don't me and Jamie Bell ever see each other? I need for Magen Thornton to drop out of college and come back to me. I miss Theodore Beyene, oddly, or perhaps not that oddly, lol. Keithbear is a traitor. I'm so proud of Alisha Harper-Motte. School is really messing up me and Jennifer West's friendship... or maybe it's that dumb job of hers! I'm going to kidnap Shey Stults and not even feel bad about it. I love Matthew Argenbright. F51 is still the light of my life. God is so good, although I am so unworthy. Praise Him.